New Years Eve

That time of year has come back around. The old year is finishing and the promise of a bright, sparkly new year is full of hope and possibility. The new year could hold any number of wonders and delights. If we look at previous form it is more likely to hold a shovel load of shit but none of it has happened yet. It is 1:45 in the morning on New Years Eve and I can't sleep. Damn it. So I thought I may as well get up and blog a little.

I love the promise of a pristine new year. Nothing has gone wrong in 2010. No one has been hurt, caused my loved ones pain, or been an asshole in 2010. 2009 may have been full of stupid people who need a good smack in the head but none of them have interfered with my 2010. I feel full of hope that by some miracle I can remove all the crap of 2009 and move into a shiney new year. I recognise that unless the earth chooses to open up and selectively swallow certain people I will have to continue to deal with them but perhaps now that I am a year older I may have been granted the wisdom and calm to deal with all things insane. I stand on the threshold of a beautiful new year and looking out across the time span is like seeing a snow field of fresh snow unsullied by man. Looking back at the year behind me I see the path that I have travelled, all the wonderful stops along the way where I got to share so much love, joy and happiness with my family and friends. True there are a couple of spots where some idiot has tried to urinate their name in the snow, but all in all a good year and definately more love than piss.

So what have I learnt this year? What can I take from the mistakes and trials of this year and turn into lessons to help me grow?

1. I have learnt that Ben will divorce me if I add another animal to the household.
2. I have learnt the he probably doesn't mean it because he loves the dog just as much as the rest of us.
3. I have learnt that while I love my cats they are mine. It took the dog for Alex to find great love and happiness from a pet.
4. I have learnt that you can buy happiness. It comes in a little tablet and costs about $30 a month.
5. I have learnt that I need to practise saying "no".
6. I have learnt that sometimes things that I spend months worrying about turn out to be a tiny bump in the road and weren't that bad after all.
7. I have learnt that my children are amazing and never to underestimate how great they are.
8. I have learnt that I am a lot more creative than I give myself credit for.
9. I have learnt that I would never have become the person I am today if my husband hadn't been such a loving and supportive man.
10. I have learnt that I really like my husband. I know it's not something that should be admitted in certain circles but there you have it, oh and I like spending time with him too.
11. I have learnt that it is possible to find a job you really love.
12. I have learnt that good friends are something special to treasure and that they make your life a lot more interesting, a little scary sometimes but definately more interesting.
13. I have learnt that you can buy three flagons of sherry at 9:00am from Dan Murphy's but the staff will offer you a straw.
14. I have learnt that my favourite lounge was in fact edible.
15. I have learnt that you can have rainbow snot if you use enough petal dust.
16. I have learnt that no matter how much you may want to you can't smack the stupity out of someone. While I am fairly certain it would feel great to give it a try it just isn't a long term solution, and you aren't supposed to be as stupid as they are.

So that's what I've come up with while I sit here pondering life, the universe and everything. I admit I have no better answer than 42, so for now I may as well stick with that. On the other hand anyone that has bothered to make it this far into my ramblings can feel free to make a contribution to the lessons of 2009. I look forward to knowing what other lessons can be obtained from the year gone by.

I hope your new year is as magical and wonderous as it promises to be. May your glass always be full and your hangovers minimal.

Dan xxx

cool photo

If you look carefully you can see that Alex is shooting water straight into the dogs mouth. I really liked this photo so thought I would share.

Dan xxx

Nearly there

Not long now and it will be Christmas day. Have started getting ready to have friends over for New Years Day. Then I get to kick back and enjoy the school holidays with the kids. So far it has been nice to have Ben home for a change. Normally he works every day except for the public holidays but this year he has decided to take some time off work. He has been really motivated and has been tidying up in the house and in the front yard. He put a nice wood panel up out the front and after it was done we had the joy of sitting in the lounge room listening to the spac next door going off her tree. 'Tis the season to be jolly.



Have discovered that while a $2 bottle of wine is a very drinkable proposition the $1.99 stuff is crap. Apparently that extra 1c makes a difference. Who would have thought that 1c could still be so important? Mind you I have 2 boxes of the stuff. Will we be flushing it down the loo? Gosh no! By the third bottle for the evening it tastes great. Lets be honest one of my friends adds lemonade to her red wine, so if I'm cracking a bottle with her I am certainly not going to break out the good stuff.

Went out for the work Christmas party last night. Had an absolute ball. The restaurant was in Parramatta and was called Inside Out. The food was magnificent. Expensive but magnificent. Fortunately my incredibly generous employers paid for the evening so Ben and I had a lovely meal, a lot of laughs and generally a great evening and only had to pay for our parking. Cool huh? Ben offered to let me drink and he would drive but as I am really attached to my job I thought it best I not drink. The problem with Ben drinking was that when we got home we started having bizarre conversations. We started chatting about my password that I used for the Bank. I had rung them that morning to find out whether or not they were planning on giving me back the money that had been stolen from my Visa card. Apparently when we joined the bank I had given them a word that I could use so that I was allowed to speak to a human being on the phone about my account. I had forgotten about this so I had to guess. Fortunately it was a good guess and therefore they were able to tell me that they really had no idea how things were going and I would just have to wait. For reasons that I can't quite remember right now I decided to tell Ben about the Bank conversation at 1:ooam after he had consumed vast amounts of alcohol. So instead of having a sensible conversation we got a bit sidetracked over the whole issue of the password. He accused me of having a boring and predictable password. Ben felt that if a word had to be provided to your financial institution then it should be incredibly random and put the person on the other end of the line on edge. Some of the suggestions were:

Blood lust
Random stabbing
Loading guns
Fight club
Killer instinct
Death to bankers
Drug run
Counterfeit money
Buildings burn
I can see you
Psycho
Toungie

You get the drift. We spent the wee hours of the morning giggling away because of all the stupid little phrases that we felt should be used for passwords.

So that's my life up to now. I have to go finish doing my baking so that I am ready for Christmas. I hope you all have a joy filled Christmas and that your families are good to you. If they aren't we still have the list.

Love to you all. Dan xxxx

Frazzled

Feeling a little over everything. Both my little beautiful babies seem to be okay at the moment, which I am truely thankful for. They both have stuff going on which makes life interesting. I have a lot of doctors appointments at the moment, which I am a bit over. Have to book myself into hospital which is a little worrying. Not sure how to discuss it with the kids. Alex gets so worried about everything and Emma bottles stuff. Haven't got up the nerve to discuss it with them yet. Booked in for my MRI on the school holidays, hope they find my brain. So many appointments and so many people relying on me to be a grown up. Must stop blogging when I am drunk. Must stop getting drunk to make the world go away.

finished for the term

I know there is still one more week of school for the kids but for me the last cake walked out the door this morning and I won't have any more cakes until next term. The beer mug cake turned out to be popular, which was to be expected. The wedding caked was eventually picked up and the bride was happy with it, I'm just happy it's gone, although I never truely feel finished until the last of the leftovers are out of the house. Thank heavens I have so many people prepared to help me out with clearing the left overs.

Emma seems to be just fine. I talked to her about the blood from her arm and she said that hadn't bothered her. Perhaps it just took a while for her brain to catch up. I sat her down to have a very serious talk about the fact that worms couldn't possibly come out of her arm (all the mums were having a joke while she was bleeding) but apparently she didn't hear any of it. She did think the idea was funny when I told her and didn't faint again so I'm guessing that hasn't bothered her at all. The fact that she didn't remember any of the conversation we were all having around her while she was bleeding possibly indicates her mind was a little more focused on the blood than she thought. I got a couple of phone calls from people who had driven by and saw her down and one of the neighbours kids popped over to check she was okay. By Monday morning everyone in the school should know that Emma fainted, hope the gossip doesn't go insane. Alex is just so relieved that he isn't going to loose his sister, he had got a little teary when we picked up the car and was telling me that he would really miss Emma if she was gone. I swear that child is slightly South American, he jumps to panic so quickly, she fainted but he is starting to work himself into a panic that she was going to die. Thankfully everything is all fine now.

For those of you with a long car trip on the way, I found a really cool puzzle at Big W. It was in with the books and is called "IQ Challenge" it is one of those write on wipe off jobs. It has a pen and cleaning cloth packed in the box and the box itself is sturdy enough to use as a little table. The kids have been enjoying the puzzles and they come in a range of levels to keep them thinking for a while. It was only $10, so I am considering going back up there and getting another one for Emma's classroom.

Hope everyone is looking forward to the school holidays as much as I am.

Dan xxx

pished again

Helene and I have had a lovely evening improving the economy. We drank two bottles of alcohol and consumed a number of snackies. We also felt the Twilight can never be watched too often. So by consuming vast quantities of alcohol we are keeping the people at Dan Murphy's employed, by eating snackies we are keeping the people at Woolworths and the gym employed (I'm going to have to work this off tomorrow) and by watching Twilight....actually there is no valid excuse, I just looooooove it. So I will leave you with a little piece of wisdom. The eyes are the nipples of the face.

Dan xxxx

phone list

It occured to me that establishing a phone list or ladder would be helpful to our group when an emergency arises. We all know the day will come when one of us ends one of our kids (quite deservedly) and it will become the responsibility of the group to hide the body. So as not to have panic and mayhem, and of course to keep the alibi straight you simply call the next name on the list and ask them to bring their item and then they will ring the next name on the list.

Dan - Shovel
Donna - Lime
Helene - Garbage bags
Relle - Drinks
Nat - Disinfectant
Des - Snacks
Sharon - Broom
Jess - Watering can

I think I have covered all the essentials. I tried to pick items that each person would find easily on hand around their home. Hope this helps you sleep easier tonight knowing there is a disaster recovery plan in place.

Thanks
Dan